The past week or so, my husband & I had two arguments. Well, one wasn’t really an argument, but it was close. It was a misunderstanding—with feeling. 😅 It could’ve easily blown up, and at one time, it definitely would have. Instead, we shared out feelings & thoughts, genuinely listened to each other, came to an understanding that gave each other the benefit of the doubt, & then we went happily on with our day.

Several days later, we had an actual argument. It was real, but very brief. It didn’t take very many minutes before we stopped, apologized sincerely, forgave one another & happily went on with our day.

Both of these incidents were unremarkable. One of a billion that happen in married life. (Or any type of relationship that spans the test of time!) In fact, they would’ve been forgotten, except for one thing. I realized later how amazing it is that my husband & I now have unremarkable arguments. That wasn’t always the case. Sure, we love each other & have for a long time. But, differences in personalities & communication styles, not to mention our own immaturity, used to lead to some pretty explosive moments. We weren’t always equipped to behave with love & care, even when we genuinely wanted to.

I wish I could say that there was a simple secret that we learned that changed things overnight. But, that isn’t what happened. Instead it’s taken time, deliberate choices, learning healthy skills & growing in personal character. (In other words: it required work! Lots of work!) But, I can very truthfully say that I hardly recognize or remember those times because they feel so far removed from our present reality.

I’m so thankful that we stuck it out & did the work. I’m so thankful for God’s grace & mercy that covers us. I’m so thankful for my husband who truly is my best friend & love. He inspires me & brings great joy into my life. I’m so thankful for our family & the life we share. We are certainly not perfect & I know we will always need to continue to grow. But, I have joy now and great hope in our future.

I don’t know what your home life, marriage, or important relationships are like. But, I am sharing this because if yours is less than what you’d like it to be, I want you to know that there is hope! Great hope, even. Healthy, thriving relationships take work. Some more than others. But, the end result is so worth it. Your marriage is worth investing in. You may not be able to see it now, but down the road the result of what you put into it today will yield fruit far greater than what you can see. So, I want to encourage you to take heart & find some hope in our story.

Happily ever after doesn’t happen magically, but it does happen—and if it can happen for us, I know it can be the end of your story, too. So, take heart, my friends! I’ll be praying for you!

Much love,

Nik